When morning came, I jumped from bed
And ran to raise the shade.
To my surprise, the sun was up;
The light was not delayed.
I turned the tap to brush my teeth,
And from it water flowed.
To my surprise, it did the same
For shower and commode.
I turned the knob to light my stove;
To my surprise it lit.
The broadcast stations for my tube
Continued to transmit.
The scale on which I set my frame
Responded with my weight.
The roads on which I drove my car
Did not disintegrate.
I’m almost very nearly close
To entertaining doubt,
Related to the narrative
The White House has put out.
But just in case, to hedge my bets,
I’ve sold my dog and cat,
And used the proceeds from the sale
To buy a foil hat.