Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Coed's Little Helper

With apologies to Mick Jagger and Keith Richards, authors of Mother’s Little Helper


What a drag it is getting bored.

“Things are different today.”
I hear every coed say
That she can’t afford to pay
For birth control.
And though she’s not really poor,
There should be a coupon for
Girls who run to find the shelter
Of a coed’s little helper,
Which will free her up to play
With her handsome fiancé.

“Boys just aren’t the same today.”
I hear every coed say,
Boys just don’t have money for
Their birth control.
They’re so hard to satisfy,
That a girl just can’t get by
Without money for the shelter
Of a coed’s little helper,
Which will get her through her nights,
Help her exercise her rights.

Doctor, please, I’m on my knees,
I can’t pay for them anymore:
What a drag it is getting bored.

“Life is much too hard today.”
I hear every coed say,
Too much study makes a girl
Into a bore.
So she takes a few of those
And he won’t need to propose,
Cause she’s found the perfect shelter
In her coed’s little helper,
For which Georgetown now will pay:
It’s the Democratic way.

Doctor, please, I’m on my knees,
I can’t pay for them anymore:
What a drag it is getting bored.

1 comment:

  1. Ha! I was wondering when Miss Fluke would become the target of your poetic wit!

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