Monday, January 9, 2012

Gross Weight

Aside from lack of labeling
On tankards used for ale,
I’ve found another reason why
I strain the bathroom scale.

According to the BMJ,
My highway rate of speed
May be to blame for what I weigh,
And not the way I feed.

The physics and biology
Which underpin the claim,
Are too complex to understand –
But help explain my frame.

For when I drive to work each day
I keep my pedal pressed,
To reach a speed just short of that
Which leads to my arrest.

Apparently, the m-p-h
Converts to l-b-s,
Which amplify my abdomen
And lead to belt largesse.

So do not blame my massive waist
On how I run amok
At breakfast, lunch and dinnertime:
The culprit is my truck.

Other gut busters:
     Vertical Limit
     Let's Move!

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