Observe the voter over there,
Naïve and mostly unaware;
Unable to divine the truth,
And fickle at the voting booth.
He listens to the evening news,
Despite its liberal left-wing views,
And claims we ought to be austere,
But his support is insincere.
He first demands a budget fight,
But rails on Congress, left and right,
And then expresses his surprise
When we attempt to compromise.
The fickle and erratic bent
Of voters that I represent,
Reminds me to amend my goals
To what I read in daily polls.
I find my measure of success
By counting times that Meet the Press
Has called and asked me to appear,
Which gives a boost to my career.
When Democrats want billions more
As patrons of the new class war,
I huddle with my chief of staff,
Then acquiesce and give them half.
For when I do the Post will say
My maverick ways have won the day,
Against the right-wing GOP,
But in the end I stand for me.
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